Tuesday, 14 April 2009

#10: KNOCK-OUT FOR OUMED

It was 10:30 am- Oumed’s usual waking time on Saturday. His mom knocked on his door,

“Oumed! Wake up, it’s almost midday! Come for breakfast! Hurry! Oumed!!”

His usual reply two minutes later was, “Yeah, yeah, I’m coming!!” But this time, there was no reply.

His mum did the usual as she would any other day. She called him to come down for breakfast and went down to set the table for him. Five minutes, Ten minutes, fifteen minutes, Their mom asked,

“Where is that boy? I always wonder whether he’s had a goodnight’s sleep?!”

She went up again,

“Oumeeeed! Breakfasts done! Come on, son!!!”

No answer…no shuffling sound..no nothing…

“Oumeeeeeeeeed!!!!!” his mom shouted thinking he’d his earphones plugged on as usual.

...

Meanwhile, Oumed was under a tree, lying unconscious on the driver’s seat, wet from last night's rain, which had poured down on him through the shattered glass window. Yes, he had been knocked-out. The front tyres of the car were smashed and a terrible smell was coming out from the engine.The glass was shattered. The brakes were squashed near the tree trunk.

He started breathing heavily and he woke up. He couldn’t move his left hand. It was too painful. He had a horrible headache as well, and it took him some time to understand what had happened. Squashed in his car, he looked around and remembered....last night, the car, I crashed...

Painfully, he reached for his mobile. And dialed Salim’s number.


Back at home, Salim was with his parents in the kitchen. He couldn’t hear his phone ringing upstairs. After helping his mom wash dishes, he went back to work on his project.

He was so concerned about Oumed he went to the backyard and climbed the ladder which Oumed had placed against his room window. He opened the window and checked around the room but no sign of Oumed. Oumed’s bathroom door was open. He couldn’t possibly be there.

Salim went back to his project but a sudden interruption, his phone started ringing. He picked it up. It was Oumed!

“Oumed, where are you? Mom and dad think your still in your room sleeping!”

“S-salim,” oumed said weakly, “I - I crashed into a tree…”

‘’Oumed, where are you?!” Salim asked with a shocked and concerned.

“I’m at Windsor Avenue, near...near the big tree.”

Salim said, “I’m comin’ okay, just stay where you are.”

Salim went downstairs fast, still gripping his phone, and told his parents,

“Mom, dad, Oumed got involved in an accident.”

His parents stop dead, “WHATTTTT?!!!!”


They all got into the car and went to Oumed. They found him lying there weak, squashed within the metals of the ruined car. They rushed him to the hospital. They remained in the waiting room while the doctor checked Oumed. His mother was very scared for Oumed, she wanted everything to be fine for her youngest son. His father was concerned too but he was also a bit angry. Oumed is always getting into trouble, he thought as he walked up and down the waiting room. Salim was sitting patiently, making dua for his brother. Finally, after some time, the doctor came out of the ward and said, " There's no major problems with your son. Though it is amazing that he survived with only a few scratches.

But I thought you should know, he was very drunk.”

My son was drunk??? Oumed’s father had a horrified look on his face.

His mother collapsed onto the chair, so shocked.

Salim turned very pale and he looked so still. Salim thought he should have taken more care of his little brother...

They all knew that he was a spoilt brat and he smoked and they all tried to talk to him, they made duas for him to change and start praying and reciting Quran, but never in their lives did they think that - he drank!!!

...

The next day, Oumed was allowed to go home. He had only sprained his right hand and had a few bruises. Miraculously, he was generally okay.

That night, it was hard for everyone to get sleep. They all kept thinking about Oumed. His mom had a dream that Oumed would change. Salim woke up in between to check on his little brother. He found him snoring as usual and kicking the blankets around him. Sleep well, little brother, he said as he closed Oumed's room door gently.

Next morning, the sun shone down warmly and the dew drops on the grass were twinkling in the light. Oumed and Salim's mom opened the curtains cheerily, remembering her dream. Salim came down in time and kissed his mother's forehead. Salim loved his mother. Heaven lies under a mother's feet, he thought as he lovingly looked at her setting the table and making breakfast for the family. It was a beautiful and quiet Sunday morning with the birds chirping sweetly in the tall trees. Their dad was skimming through the newspaper. Soon, the last member of the family joined them too.

When Oumed, with his red hair tousled, came down walking slowly down the steps, every one was hopeful. His mom, dad and Salim thought that at last Oumed would change. This has to be the final call for him to change! He survived such a crash, he must realise how lucky he is!

They were all looking at him hopefully....

“What?! Why’s everyone staring at me?” Oumed said in a very grumpy voice. That ruined everyone’s hope!

Everyone was quiet. Oumed's grumpy early morning voice was echoing through their minds. His father finally broke the silence.

“So how do you feel, son?” His father asked.

“I feel just fine!” Oumed shot back.

The nerve...He doesn't even have respect for his father! thought his father. He wanted to scold him and tell him what he’d done. But then Oumed was still weak so he wanted some days to pass so he could have a talk with his son when he was stronger.

Tears were in his mother’s eyes. Why was his son like this? Everyone cared for him and they wanted the best for him.

Oumed sat down on the chair like an old man. His whole body was aching. He grumpily ate his breakfast and went back to his room. He wanted to listen to the latest hits but then he remembered his father had broken his boom box. He plugged in his earphones and started listening to his favourite songs. He thought about getting his ears pierced soon…and he fell asleep.

11 comments:

ellen557 said...

I always feel so frustrated with Oumed!
That being said, I'm really enjoying this :)

Asmi's Journal said...

Thanks Ellen! <3 :)

malekat_el7oriya said...

i love these stories! you're an amazing writer asmi :)

Like ellen, i'm very frustrated with oumed, but hopefully he will change.

SirAdib.com said...

So frustrating we're hoping for the next chapter. Good job!

Asmi's Journal said...

Lol, every one of you used the word 'frustrated/frustrating.' Oumed sure is getting on your nerves, isn;t he? :P

Thanks for the kind comments and motivation, every one! :)

CooL MuslimaH said...

Assalmaualikum asmi..

I just glance at ur blog and since its past midnight i'm drooping with sleep but your story kept me glued to the screen..It's wonderful MashAllah...really goood job...i love the way you r using your writing skills to spread awareness regarding islam..goood!

p.S- But i can't believe nor accept that someone can b so rude to their parents like oumed..its unbelievable..specially a muslim gur..i cant blv it honestly.

JazakAllah khair.
ma'salam.

CooL MuslimaH said...

2 typying mistakes above-
*glanced
*guy

sorry

Asmi's Journal said...

Thanks Cool Muslimah! Hehe, maybe I was exaggerating Oumed's rudeness to his parents a little. But then that's how bad guys're supposed to be right? >_>

Besides he's a teenager so he's finding it hard to control himself and stuff...>_>

SirAdib.com said...

<_<

CooL MuslimaH said...

hehe...u r right sistah!

Nevin said...

LOL i found it funny when he was walkin down the stairs and he said, "What! Why is everyone staring at me?!" haha guess he hasnt learnt his lesson! i felt sad for the parents and brother, they had their hopes up high :(